STEPFAMILY ASSOCIATION

Share your parenting advice.

While I would never call up my husband’s ex-wife and try to engage her in a lesson about parenting, I don’t hold back sharing my thoughts, feelings and opinions with my husband.

As the father of my children, I don’t think it matters whether or not one of our daughters is not biologically mine. I still have plenty of insight and wisdom to share.

This process of communication has made it possible for both of us to learn and teach each other a variety of parenting advice. We share unique insights about the same child and value her feelings in different ways.

Sharing my parenting advice helps my husband view his daughter a little differently than he may be naturally inclined to do, which helps her feel more understood. Our co-parenting also helps us deal with stress during times when blended family challenges surface in our lives.

Address of the bookmark: http://www.nj.com/parenting/index.ssf/2013/04/ways_to_handle_stress_for_chil.html

Promote co-parenting.

I’ve seen some great examples of co-parenting among divorced couples. It’s not an easy accomplishment to recognize the other parent is just as important as you are after divorce.

As a step parent, I think good parenting begins with encouraging functional co-parenting between my husband and his ex, even if it doesn’t actually happen.

Will blended families all be happy if exes get along? It’s hard to say, but it does lessen the effects of divorce on children and it gives step parents a neutral role when things get ugly.

As a step mom, this has made me a safe haven many times for my step daughter when dealing with stress.

Address of the bookmark: http://www.nj.com/parenting/index.ssf/2013/04/ways_to_handle_stress_for_chil.html

What happens in a stepfamily situation when the biological parent is torn between standing by their children and standing by their spouse? How can a parent choose?

Well, the answer is: They shouldn’t choose. They have to have strong and honest enough relationships with both their children and their spouses to be able to openly communicate and discuss – and to see - both sides.

While it’s true that the bio-parent may feel in the middle, they certainly don’t want their spouse to feel alone. That pretty much defeats the purpose of family and certainly isn’t incentive for the stepparent to remain in the family.

Address of the bookmark: http://www.examiner.com/article/the-importance-of-couple-strength-stepfamilies?cid=rss

Holidays are a time of fun, happiness, bonding beautifully with our children and stepchildren... one big happy family... like the Brady Bunch... right?

Most often these times can be filled with dread. Will the other parent mess about with the visitation schedule, will the children come back from their absent parent needing to be re programmed when they get back.

Will all the clothes they went with be returned, will they have been told mistruths and been subjected to you being badmouthed. Or maybe the children you don't like are around for even longer and your partner is consumed with their needs and you feel like a spare part... or the chief cook and bottle washer.

Address of the bookmark: http://www.stepfamily.asn.au/content/view/4021/723/