| Women suffer the most emotional upheaval |
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Women suffer the most emotional upheaval in stepfamilies. I like the way Psychology Today put it: "Name a stepfamily dilemma and women - biological mothers, stepmothers, even stepdaughters - are at the center of the problem ... Ever sensitive to interpersonal problems, women sense problems all over the place in stepfamilies." And since women tend to believe that they are responsible for everybody, they move toward a problem to work on it - whether it's theirs to work on or not. Research also shows that, for most women, self-esteem is dependent on smooth relationships. They get depressed when stepfamily life goes badly and they blame themselves. Now, that's a lot of bad news. But there is a silver lining: if your children are having a hard time adjusting to the blended family situation ... that's normal. If your marriage is strained because of the family problems ... that's normal. If your kids are divided in loyalty between mom and dad ... that's normal. If you're a stepparent on the receiving end of harsh treatment by your spouse's kids ... that's normal. If you're a woman in a blended family and you're more stressed than the rest of the family .. that's normal. It's not you, it's not your spouse, it's not the kids. It's the reality of the situation. That might be the best news that some of you have heard in a long time. Be encouraged! Source: Player to be Named http://www.northheartland.org/1996/051996m.htm |
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